Couple–Centered Recovery®

OUR PHILOSOPHY FOR MARRIAGE & COUPLES TREATMENT

Traditional Models

In traditional treatment for addiction recovery, marriage or couples work is typically engaged minimally at the beginning of the process, with both individuals being told to pursue their separate recovery plans. In this model, those in relationship have disconnected, but parallel movement toward recovery and healing. They are instructed to keep their respective sides of the street clean. Research conducted in traditional models has found most individuals require 3-5 years to reach the final stage of the recovery process.

The Partner Trauma Model

The most recent research reveals that partners of addicts have often been misdiagnosed as codependent or having an addiction of their own. We now know that for many of these partners, their emotions and behaviors are actually a reaction to trauma experienced within the relationship. Sensitivity to partner trauma is essential to avoid further trauma brought on by the treatment process and to promote healing for the partner and the relationship.

The Couple–Centered Recovery® Model

At its root, addiction is usually an intimacy disorder. By placing the clients’ primary relationship at the center of the recovery process, we believe couples can experience healing faster and deeper. With an emotionally-focused, attachment-attentive process, the relationship that was the source of injury can become the very place of healing. Through rigorous honesty, addicts learn to respond differently to their internal shame and grow in their ability to give their partners the intimacy they desire and deserve.

More than communication. Connection.

Many couples think communication is the number one problem in their relationship. But plenty of people who are fine talkers and listeners are miserable with one another, and plenty of couples fight like cats and dogs all day and go to bed every night feeling very much in love.

Communication is not the problem. Lack of connection is. We believe that learning to connect deeply, to experience real intimacy, is not just the goal of the relationship. Connection is the pathway of reaching the goal, as well.

Phases of Treatment for Relationship Recovery

This is a general outline of the recovery process through which we lead couples at Daring Ventures.

  • Connector.

    Assess

    Every good treatment plan begins with a thorough assessment of both the addict and partner. We seek to understand both individuals and their needs as we design their plan for recovery and healing.

  • Connector.

    Stabilize

    Couples usually must begin by learning initial tools and skills that put an end to the damaging cycle they’ve been in and establish a sense of safety. This stability allows for a process of disclosure between the addict and partner.

  • Connector.

    Rebuild

    After disclosure, couples must begin processing the impact of addiction and its discovery on their relationship. During this time, a major emphasis is placed on rebuilding trust.

  • Connector.

    Transform

    Once trust begins to be rebuilt, couples can start the deep work of transforming the relational dynamic that exists between them. By exploring underlying issues together, they can experience and cultivate meaningful and lasting connection and intimacy.

  • Connector.

    Grow

    With a new, healthy relational dynamic, couples are guided toward a process of charting a new course for their lives with intention and clarity. Based on shared values, they recommit to one another and a renewed vision of the relationship.